In my final year at Seminary, for my MDiv, we had a module on Homiletics, and part of our assignment was to pick an entire book (from the Bible) and build a sermon series around it. I chose the book (or memoirs) of Nehemiah because of my love, and interest in historical narrative.
After graduation, I joined my local church as a full-time youth minister, and through a strange turn of events and an impending need, I ended up writing and directing a high school musical based on Nehemiah.
That was 13 years ago.
This morning, as I strolled around my parents’ house, the railings caught my attention.
Here in Dimapur, most houses have what we call a veranda. A space right outside the house: an open area with a roof, pillars, no walls, no windows, and maybe some cane furniture, potted plants, etc. And our veranda, as much as we love it, has been terribly exploited by our two faithful German shepherd guards, Max and Zoe. They are so faithful; sometimes I feel they are human. Anyway, at night, they roam around the compound and get into all sorts of mischief and bring their exploits and place them on our very clean, white-tiled veranda. And because we live in a place where lots of creatures crawl around, especially at night, Max and Zoe feel it is their duty to capture them and place them on our veranda.
So, every morning, my Mom would wake up to the sight of a pool of blood and the wild creatures lying next to it. Finally, she decided enough is enough and built an iron/drill wall around the veranda (see picture).
It’s been a few months now, and so far, so good.
Now, every morning when we wake up, we can have our morning tea or coffee on the veranda without seeing any gory graphic details of their exploits. And somehow, Max and Zoe have also lessened their activities in this regard, perhaps sensing our displeasure.
It made me think about boundaries and how building walls helps and protects us.
In the memoirs of Nehemiah, the story is about building a literal wall around the holy city of Jerusalem.
"Come, let us rebuild the wall of Jerusalem, and we will no longer be in disgrace."Nehemiah 2:17
The physical wall carried a symbolic meaning. It also holds a message of honour and identity.
Walls stood to create a sense of belonging, and the whole story of Nehemiah is literally about rebuilding the 'wall' to restore their dignity and sense of belonging as the people of God.
In Ezekiel 42:20, it says, "It had a wall around it... to separate the holy from the common."
“Not everything or everyone belongs in your most personal, intimate space. Setting up a wall helps you distinguish between safe people (holy/healthy spaces) and unsafe people (common/destructive spaces).”
Walls or boundaries are not a bad thing, as popular left-wing media so amplifies these days.
Sometimes walls are meant to protect us; they create healthy boundaries.
Those of us growing up in large Asian families are only too familiar with the intrusion of boundaries and spaces, and how tiresome and traumatic it gets. Family obligation is often treated as having zero boundaries, and we never have the right to say no.
Drawing healthy boundaries protects us, and maybe even the other person.
Boundaries also help us keep our good circle in and the toxic ones out, not because we hate or fear them, but to protect our peace, and it even helps others by limiting their toxic trespassing, like how Max and Zoe lessen their nightly exploits after sensing our displeasure.
Scripture also refers to a person with no self-control as being like a 'broken wall,' defenceless and shameful. (Proverbs 25: 28).
And about 'guarding' our hearts, because it will affect everything we do (Proverbs 4:23).
These two concepts of a broken wall and guarding ourselves set the tone towards creating healthy boundaries.
When I was studying in Europe, I thought the West was so ‘free’ and liberal: there are no walls, no rules, everything is permissible, and no one judges. But then, over the years, I slowly realised that every action has consequences, and the Bible tells us that ‘not everything is permissible.'
Paul warns us about this and says
"‘I have the right to do anything,’ you say, but not everything is permissible. ‘I have the right to do anything’, but not everything is constructive." (1 Corinthians 10:23).
In Stella Gibbons's “The Walled Garden”, the story follows the protagonist who moves to a quiet village, married to a nice doctor, with a child, and surrounded by a ‘walled’ garden. She often pines for her past life in the city and the bohemian circle she once knew, and only after her old friends visit and bring their chaos into her peaceful world is she reminded how grateful she is for the present. 'Inside the wall, everything is safe, so the fruits and flowers can grow, without damage and attacks from outside forces.’
This morning, even as I sit on the veranda, sipping my chai, on the clean white tile floors, I am thankful for the walled iron grills and the boundaries they have set.
I pray this will set a precedent for me (and maybe help whoever is reading this) that it’s not about isolating ourselves, but knowing when to say no and having godly discernment in setting up not just healthy, but holy boundaries.
“And whatever you do, whether in word or deed, do it all in the name of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks to God the Father through him." Colossians 3:17
