Have you ever been in one of those episodes of your life where the waiting is so long that you begin to have an existential crisis? The queue feels like the one outside an SBI bank or how Indian speed post operates, and there is no answer.
Or that's just me.
But I do often go through these morbid episodes, and I have my ups and downs, the high mountaintop experiences, and the wailing in the valley ones. Anyway, since this year started, I finally got a break on my studies/career, or at least a small sign to head in a certain direction, but then again, the lull.
As always, I had a lot of questions and was questioning my decisions like every over-thinker tends to. And yes, the usual routine of fasting and praying, reading scriptures, reflecting, devotional time, seeking counsel, the works, but still no answer.
There was literally a lull.
No answer.
And so, I waited.
And waited.
And waited...weeks turned into months.
And then, last night, I finally received an email that did not start with, "We regret to inform you."
This time it was a positive one.
So after praying and thanking the Lord, my thoughts suddenly shifted to the story of God providing Manna -
Exodus 16: 15 And Moses told them, It is the food the Lord has given you. The LORD says that each household should gather as much as it needs- V17- So the people of Israel gathered this food- some gathering more, and some getting less.V18-...Everyone had just enough. Those who gathered a lot had nothing left over, and those who gathered only a little had enough. Each family had just what it needed.
I was also drawn to Matthew 6:11, "Give us our food for today/ or Give us today our daily bread," and the correlation of fresh daily bread—God meeting us at our point of need, our daily provider.
He doesn't want us to hoard, nor be in lack, but to trust in Him, on a daily basis.
It dawned on me that these passages affirm the news I received last night (even though it was a small act). It made me realise that the Lord is always on time. He gives us just what we need, not too much and never lacking. He moves at the right time, with the exact dosage of affirmation we need and require.
The Lord is patient and kind regarding answers to prayers that we sow in tears, our endless questions and doubts, and even our cynical tendencies. He watches our going and coming. He knows each strand of hair on us. He is never late or early. The sufficiency of the Lord not only strengthens us but also humbles us. It enables us to lean on Him and trust in Him, no matter our earthly circumstances. The Lord is faithful and true.
He gives us just enough to sustain us, never too much, nor deprives us, lest we become proud and arrogant and forget Him, or steal and disgrace His name. (Proverbs 30: 7-9).
And so, the next time anyone has a quirky tendency like mine to hasten prayers, seek answers, or is about to jump down the rabbit hole of self-doubt, remember that we will get the right amount of affirmation just at the right time—nothing more, nothing less. The Bread is always fresh, never half-baked, never stale.
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